Serenity now!

You know that AA serenity prayer thing? It goes kind of like this:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.

Now, this is not to disparage Alcoholics Anonymous (I have other reasons for that, but that isn’t germane to this issue), but I find this to be at least partially bullshit. Accepting the things that you can’t change sounds like a shortcut to slacking.

So I gained 0.6 pounds on Sunday, 1.4 on Monday, and 1.8 this morning. That’s 3.8 pounds over three days. This was a good weekend, too. I really kicked ass. I went to a baseball game on Saturday, watched a football game at a bar on Saturday night, and went to the Bumbershoot festival on Sunday. And I stayed in line. I had no more than 2500 calories on any day, I put in a hell of a workout on Sunday morning at the hotel (seriously, my shirt plopped when I dropped it on the floor afterward) and I rocked six miles yesterday morning. This leads me to believe that as far as my weight gain goes in the early part of the week, I have no say in the matter. My body seems to like losing quickly during the week and gaining less that that back over the weekend. In the end, the result is still weight loss, right?

So I could accept that. It’s very likely true that even if I had done everything right – and really, all that would entail eating less salt and drinking less beer – I would likely still have gained some weight the last few days. So yes, I could accept that and be a little easier on myself. But let’s say I do that. I accept that weight gain over the weekend is something approaching inevitable. Let’s say that over the next few days, I lose six or eight or ten pounds, and on Saturday night, I’m hungry. I’ve finished Warrior Dash, I’m feeling really proud of myself, and I’m driving by a McDonald’s.

Now I know that McDonald’s is seriously unhealthy food, at least the things I like to eat there. I also will say that I find that shit to be delicious and I would eat it always in large amounts if it would not lead to me being dead. Eat shit Morgan Spurlock, long live McChicken!

So let’s say, again, that I’m driving by this McDonald’s, and I really want something. I know that I’m likely to gain a few pounds over the next several days no matter what I do, and several months of Quarter Pounder-free living has got me craving some fast-food goodness. Who’s more likely to skip it and head home to make some fish tacos? Is it the guy that has accepted that the weight is going to be gained? Or is it the guy that says to himself: 3.8 pounds? Well fuck that. The scale can kiss 3.8 pounds of my ass because I’m losing weight this weekend. I always perform better when I have something to compete with. Even if it’s myself. Even if it’s myself and some benchmark that I’ve contrived for no other reason than to motivate me.

Anyway, otherwise things are going well. I’ve been putting a lot of miles on the new shoes, to the point that I’m planning on retiring them after Warrior Dash after only a couple of months. This is partially due to the large amount of miles I’ve put on them, partially due to the large amount of weight that they bear, partially due to the strange way I walk exclusively on the outside of my feet, and partially because they are $25 shoes. This week I’m planning a trip to the Fit Right NW for a gait analysis and a new pair of shoes that will cost more than I ever intended to spend on shoes that would be used for exercise. However, I will look more like a real runner, at least from the ankle down.